dreary day

     itz pretty rare for me to get really  down and discouraged. i'm not really the type to dwell on the unpleasant things or the hard things in life. i usually just get through it as it comes and usually choose not to dwell on those things, because honestly, there are so many more things in life to smile about than to get depressed about. Even if things are burdening me, therez usally always something or someone that gets me to smile. and i like that. I like that God made me that way, because i can easily bounce back and not dwell on the things that go wrong. He made me with a joyous heart and a light heart that is simple, and a way of looking at life in the light of His glory.

    today though...is a day out of the ordinary. for some reason, i couldn't just bounce back and smile. for some reason, one thing after another kept coming up, and my heart just hurts. i'm so burdened right now with desires for unreachable things, the hurt of words, and the feeling of failure. right now, i just want my daddy. i want my daddy to hold me, stroke me hair, and just listen to me cry. i just want to be held by my daddy.

    This is the kind of day that daddy isn't here though. i'm a grown woman, living independently in a big city of chicago, where i'm one of millions. Daddy is hundreds of miles away, and i can't get to him to cry or be held. 

     I'm still blessed though. I'm blessed that God is able to fulfill my need of wanting to be wrapped in love. I can cry to Him, and know of His love. He's never hundreds of miles away, He's always right here right now where i can reach out to Him.